A Simple Will

“I will” is such an easy thing to say but I’ve noticed that the majority of people who say they will do something don’t generally follow through with it. I’ve been told before that one of the reasons I am admirable is because when I say I will do something, I actually do it. I know I’m not perfect at this but I truly try to do what I say I will do.

I really don’t get it. Maybe it’s my stubbornness but when I decide something, not a lot of things can change my mind. I think this is one of the reasons I’ve been able to go without self harming. I told myself a long time ago that I wouldn’t ever cut and I still have not. It’s also why my testimony is the way that it is. But I don’t get why other people don’t just change. If you want something to be different, just make it different. You are in control of your lives to an extent.

Scenario 1: Person 1 is working a job that requires them to work on Sundays. They are sad about it and say that they feel bad because in their patriarchal blessing it specifically tells them not to. “So quit,” I tell them simply. An easy fix. “I can’t, I need the job.” “But if you quit, you’re demonstrating faith and I am sure you will be taken care of.” “You’re the first person to tell me that. Even my bishop told me to keep working.”

Scenario 2: Person 2 is dating someone even though they aren’t 16 yet and are asking for my advice. “Break up and wait. You’ll be blessed for it,” I tell them. “But I can’t, I love him.”

Scenario 3: Person 3 was excommunicated from the church years ago and tells their family and the missionaries they want to get back into the church. “So go to church?” I suggest. “I can’t.”

Why do people say “I can’t” instead of “I will” when it’s such an easy fix.  I don’t mean to sound self righteous and I know I have to work on this too but often times it’s just a simple will and a little bit of faith to change something entirely for the better. All of these people are in my life and I still don’t understand why they couldn’t just change. They all had at least a little bit of desire to, but none of them were willing to make the commitment to change. It’s such a strange thing to me.

Bye, bye, butterfly

❤ Annee

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